Where there are relationships, there will be conflict, it is an inevitable part of interpersonal dynamics, and learning to resolve conflict is a crucial part of successful relationships both at home and work. Many people will just keep quiet rather than express their viewpoint to avoid conflict, which is a great shame because by doing so we might miss out on an exciting new idea.
There are a number of differences in how men and women tend to handle disagreements. Some of these differences are rooted in biological factors, while others are due to social conditioning.
Biological factors
Hormones
Testosterone, which is more prevalent in men, has been linked to aggression and dominance. Estrogen, which is more prevalent in women, has been linked to empathy and cooperation.
Brain structure
The brains of men and women are wired differently, with some areas being larger or more active in one sex than the other. For example, the amygdala, which is involved in processing emotions, is larger in men than in women.
Social conditioning
Gender roles
Men are often socialised to be assertive and competitive, while women are often socialised to be cooperative and nurturing. These different expectations can influence how men and women approach disagreements.
Communication styles
Men and women tend to communicate differently. Men are more likely to use direct language and to focus on problem-solving, while women are more likely to use indirect language and to focus on building relationships.
How these differences play out in disagreements
Men are more likely to take a competitive approach to disagreements, while women are more likely to take a cooperative approach. Men may be more likely to see disagreements as a contest that they need to win, while women may be more likely to see disagreements as an opportunity to find a solution that works for everyone involved.
Men are more likely to use direct language and to focus on problem-solving, while women are more likely to use indirect language and to focus on building relationships. When men disagree with someone, they may be more likely to say things like “You’re wrong” or “That’s not a good idea.” Women, on the other hand, may be more likely to say things like “I’m not sure I agree with you” or “I’m worried about that.”
Men are more likely to withdraw from disagreements, while women are more likely to try to smooth things over. When men are feeling overwhelmed or stressed, they may be more likely to withdraw from the situation altogether. Women, on the other hand, may be more likely to try to smooth things over and keep the peace.
Of course, these are just generalisations. There are many men who take a cooperative approach to disagreements, and there are many women who take a competitive approach. Ultimately, the way that someone handles a disagreement is influenced by a variety of factors, including their personality, their cultural background, and their individual experiences.