Making eye contact isn’t always easy. It can feel awkward at times, especially when you haven’t yet built a bond with the other person.
But why is eye contact important in the first place?
Let’s uncover why eye contact matters and what you can do to improve your eye contact skills. Here are some secrets of maintaining eye contact:
Use the 50/70 rule
This means that you should maintain eye contact for 50 per cent of the time when you are speaking, and 70 per cent of the time when you are listening.
Hold eye contact for 4-5 seconds at a time
This is long enough to show that you are paying attention, but not so long that it becomes uncomfortable.
Look at the other person’s eyes, not their forehead or their nose
This will help you to maintain a natural and relaxed gaze.
Blink naturally
Don’t try to hold your eyes open too wide or to avoid blinking altogether.
Vary your eye contact
Don’t stare at the other person the whole time. Look away occasionally, and then back again.
Pay attention to the other person’s reactions
If they seem uncomfortable or intimidated by your eye contact, then you may need to break it more often.
Here are some additional tips for maintaining eye contact:
Practice with friends or family members
This will help you to feel more comfortable making eye contact with others.
Pay attention to the way other people make eye contact
This can give you a good idea of what is considered appropriate in different situations.
Be aware of your own cultural background
In some cultures, eye contact is considered to be disrespectful or aggressive.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
If you are struggling with eye contact, there are many resources available to help you improve your skills.
Don’t make these mistakes
Staring – This can make the other person feel uncomfortable or threatened.
Avoiding eye contact altogether – This can make you seem uninterested or untrustworthy.
Breaking eye contact too quickly – This can make you seem shifty or dishonest.
Glaring – This can make you seem angry or aggressive.
Maintaining eye contact is an important part of nonverbal communication. By following these tips, you can learn to make eye contact in a way that is natural, confident, and respectful.